Wakeup Call

It’s sad that it takes a wakeup call to make a person want to change for the better, or live a different life style, or do something differently.  I guess one good thing that can come from a wakeup call is that it motivates us BUT as humans those wake up calls don’t last too long before we are back to the old normal lifestyle.

Lately, I feel like the world has had so many of these wakeup calls, the Colorado shooting for instance. It’s absolutely never a thought in any one’s mind that they may go to see a movie, and never ever come back home.  Did they tell their family they loved them before they left? Did they live life the way THEY wanted to live?

…

Martha. Shes been on my mind all week. She was my new neighbor; we met her about 5 months ago during our building process of our new homes. She was young, single, had no kids. Just a woman that we knew we were going to fully enjoy having around. Derek and I jokingly called her Martha Stuart. She had built her house to perfection and had an interior decorator come in. It was absolutely beautiful. She was a young 49 year old woman whom seemed to be in good shape.

Little did we know Martha was a woman living her second chance at life. Come to find out some time last year she found out she had adrenal cancer, and was completely caught by surprise that her life was about to be cut short. She was able to have surgery right away and was shocked when they told her they got it ALL. She received a second chance to live. This led her to do what she wanted to do. She was so adorable driving around in her little red VW bug and the way she would be-bop around the place checking out everyone’s new homes that were just built and showing off her new home with such excitement. None of us would have ever known that her cancer was back.

After she purchased her home she went back for her 6 month re-check and was totally covered with this horrific cancer. All in all her spirits were extremely high. Not once did she/or we think she would actually pass. The last time I saw her I was picking her off of the garage floor in which she had fallen. We were told she had up to a year. Little did anyone know that she wouldn’t even last close to 60 days.

My point of this blog it to share my wakeup call with everyone else. Everyone needs a little reminder that life is indeed short and that there is nothing guaranteed about it. Her passing (as in any passing) reminds me to keep those important friendships, important and that strong family strong. It reminds me to be a good/better person, love hard, keep good secrets, help those in need and most importantly, LOVE. LOVE ALL. No matter the race, gender, republican, democrat, gay or straight. No matter who did what to who and who was wrong and right. In the end doesn’t everyone just want the same thing? To love and be loved in return?

Delivery and motherhood

I know, I know…I am literally the worlds worst at keeping up with my blog. See, mommy hood struck me HARD. Once Britton arrived I suddenly forgot how to multitask. I couldn’t answer my phone or text anyone back, I didn’t have time to have visitors NOR did I have time to shower…I was a walking zombie who would forget to eat and couldn’t sleep (even if I wanted to). I was learning how to be a mom.  I am not going to lie this was the hardest job I’ve ever had in my entire life! Very much rewarding but very very VERY hard to figure out.  As you know thru my past blog writings, people liked to tell me exactly how my pregnancy was going to go. SO HOW COME NO ONE TELLS YOU HOW HARD THE FIRST MONTH IS GOING TO BE? I like to be warned people….maybe not when it came to my pregnancy but tips on preparing for that first month would be been nice. Ha….

Keep reading….if you don’t, that first paragraph is going to make you think I don’t like being a mom. The word LOVE is a total understatement for the way I feel about being a new mom. There literally is nothing in the world like it.

Let’s talk Delivery! I’ve seen beautiful pictures of my friends with their new sweet babies RIGHT after delivery and they look amazing. Almost like the baby walked itself right out of the womb with not a single sweat particle on them.  Well….Let’s just say I was wrong when I thought I would look like the same person that walked in the hospital, after delivery. WRONG. Way way wrong.

We were at the hospital and in labor by 2:00 in the afternoon December 30^th! Which was perfect because I was going to push him right out (easily) before midnight so he didn’t have to have his birthday on the New Years Eve holiday. My plans were just that, and Derek and I were going to share a sweet moment overlooking our new baby boy new years eve night in the hospital with some smuggled champagne, celebrating this new life along with the new year.  

Well, that’s not really how it happened. My family came for support which was super awesome of them even though I wasn’t allowing them to be in for actual delivery. Knowing they were there meant so much. Even when I was having contractions like crazy and didn’t look like I loved anyone at the time, I truly did. If I remember correctly I went from 4 cm to 7 cm in a matter of 5 minutes.  SO I went from an okay nervous Jessica to a NO ONE TALK TO ME Jessica, as I gripped the bars of the bed not knowing why they suddenly got worse.  

The nurse walks in and checks me…”oh my God, family out! Hurry, we will let you back in when we figure out what’s going on”. My face if it wasn’t already white, turned white. A team of nurses rushed in and I quickly got stabbed with a needle and some sort of medicine into my left shoulder. We find out that Brittons heart rate had nearly stopped. The medicine made me convulse, but sped his heart rate right back up. Poor Derek was standing back after being pushed aside wide eyed and feeling helpless I’m sure. This happened a number of times. The medicine they pumped into my system stopped ALL my labor each and every time to boost Brittons heart rate. These nurses had me rolling over in all directions trying to get his heart rate up. They even turned me upside down. Seriously...in the bed, nearly upside-down. Ask Derek, I’m sure it was a pretty site. All kinds of thoughts were running thru my head but I lay there speechless asking no questions just praying everything was going to be okay.  At one point I know I said “We’ve come too far to lose him”. That may sound dramatic to you but this was my delivery, so to me it was the most traumatic experience ever. The emergency team rushed in and threw out all the tools for an emergency C-Section. I was throwing up, had blown blood vessels in my eyes and crying. This wasn’t the delivery I thought I would have. To make it worse the nurses and Doctor were having spats right in front of me about what they should do. In the middle of pushing Brittons heart rate flat lined…Everyone stopped and stared at the machine and my Doctor said to the nurses “What, are you going to do, pump her with the medicine again??” He was being a smart ass because he was ready for me to have this baby not only because the hospital was so busy and he was needed but for Brittons safety. They said Britton couldn’t handle anymore and had to come out. When the heart rate didn’t show back up, the doctor first tried the vacuum.  Thank God we didn’t have to do a c-section and out came my sweet baby boy. Because of everything that had gone on I couldn’t hold him immediately. Derek and I sat there stunned at what we just went thru as Britton just stared at us while the doctors were checking him out. We were so overcome by his sweet face that we didn’t realize that he hadn’t cried. Finally, a wimper came out that brought tears to both of our eyes. It was the sweetest wimper I had ever heard. Until the doctor burst our bubble “This isn’t the cry we want”. Apparently they are supposed to cry pretty loud. They did several tests and after what seemed like hours we finally we got to hold him. All I could say after seeing him was “I could totally do this again”. Everything we went thru was so worth all the pain and trouble. The instant connection you get is such an amazing feeling.

 As the nurse took us to our room it was 5 in the morning (EXHAUSTED was the word for the next three days in the hospital). She told us how hard the day was and that there were 74 babies born.They were short staffed and EVERY delivery on my hallway was an emergency c-section. She said the nurses were determined that mine not be. Her exact words “I’m not going to lie to you, we were all so scared for your baby”. Those words nearly made me cry. The thought of leaving the hospital with no baby was a thought that never crossed my mind. It truly made me grateful and made me appreciate the experience so much more.

I’m convinced that nothing in my life comes easy BUT that it’s all worth it. Britton is now a healthy 3 ½ month old. He has the most adorable face (but I’m a little partial). I’ve finally learned to multi task and I now know how to get out of the house WITH my baby. Haha I’m just now finding time to get back in shape and I’m able to travel with him to go see family and friends. BUT the thing I’m most pleased with is my ability to dodge the pee stream.  SCORE! 

That first month may have been so hard but I learned so much and being a mom now feels like second nature. Those four o’clock in the morning feedings are so much easier on me, especially when he smiles at me behind the bottle letting milk spill. He is such a loving baby, constantly smiling and rarely crying. His smile and his patience make me want to give him the world.

SO I may not have had the most easy delivery…and I definitely didn’t come out of the hospital looking like I did when I came in and I most definitely didn’t get that smuggled champagne I so desired for new years eve…BUT I came out of the hospital with a husband that I now looked at differently. I had a whole new love for him. Seeing him love Britton and hold him the way that he did, and all the help that he was made me want to be a better person.  We came out of that hospital with a new meaning of what is like to be a protector and to be selfless …and most importantly we came out of that hospital a family of three.

Pregnancy Peeved

It’s been 8 months and literally I have yet to buy maternity pants! If your thinking “wow! That’s great, she must not be gaining weight”…you’re wrong.  I have gained more than enough for two maybe three pregnant women. See, when I first got pregnant EVERY woman in this entire world felt the need to tell me just exactly when I would gain weight in my pregnancy and when I would need to be jumping into those lovely maternity pants. Most claim to LOVE them, but personally…what’s more unattractive then low wasted jeans with a foot long stretchy band cloth like thing that basically goes up to your chin?? Comfortable?? Perhaps, but if you know me you know I’m stubborn. I admit, I didn’t need such pants until about 5 almost 6 months pregnant. I made sure to squeeze into every pair of pants that I already owned before going out and spending money on ugly pants for the next four months. To me, that’s pointless.  When I could no longer squeeze into those pants (wait, maybe it was when I started popping buttons?) Well; whenever it was, I went out and bought larger sized pants…That’s right, jeans for the “curvy women”. Ha! How about that for all those that said I would be in maternity pants by month four.  Suckers.  Leggings, and “curvey women” stretchy jeans…You are my hero.

Another pregnancy pet peeve of mine - WHY is it that everyone says things like…

·         “If you haven’t gotten stretch marks yet, you will.

·         “If you haven’t gained over 25 pounds, you will.

·         “If you don’t have heart burn yet, you will.

·         “If you’re still sleeping thru the night, just wait…Your going to get so fat and uncomfortable soon that you won’t be able to sleep thru the night”

·         “If you boobs are not each separately the size of watermelons, just wait…they will be”

·         “If your feet don’t match Fred Flintstones yet, they will.

·         “Bet you don’t last past month six working on your feet all day”

·         “If your face isn’t as big as your belly yet, just wait….it will be. (Okay, maybe I made that one up but only because my face literally is as pregnant as my belly)

I just don’t understand why anyone would think that my pregnancy is going to be just like theirs.  Those types of comments are exactly what make me so stubborn.  It’s been eight months and I have yet to complain until now.  I work full time, still on my feet 8 hours a day and have yet to miss a day due to pregnancy in all of these eight months. Yes, some of these things may happen in my last month (even if it was “supposed” to happen months ago) but honestly WHY does anyone care? Sounds to me like those that went thru all those complications want every other pregnant woman to go thru the same.

There, I’m done with my pregnancy bitch fest. So, on to the funnies. So far, my pregnancy is going great! I truthfully can’t complain about anything other than getting fatter. Which I know, it’s just what happens and what comes along with it all and needs to be accepted, BUT it’s hard! You wouldn’t think putting on shoes is hard but with a massive belly like mine, I need to wake up five minutes earlier every morning! Because putting them on never fails to run me late for work.  I should probably wake up ten minutes earlier because I need an additional five minutes just to roll out of bed.  I swear the only thing that makes me move fast these days, is if a bug or spider is near me and I need to make a quit exit to the bathroom to grab my strong hold hair spray so I can freeze kill it! That’s right, it freezes them in place so my husband can come home and finish the job so I don’t have to touch those nasty little creatures.  The other thing about having a massive belly that I’m not use to is trying to fit into the places that I’m used to fitting in. Some things as simple as opening the door just enough for me and my normal size belly to fit thru, forgetting that there is more that needs to go thru now. I always hit my belly on things, trying to squeeze into my normal places. I can no longer fit between our shampoo bowls at work. The girls have to leave the end ones open for me.  If I try to fit between the shampoo bowls my belly touches one bowl and my pregnant butt touches the one behind me. This is neither cool, nor okay for the client trying to enjoy a nice shampoo in the bowl behind me.  I even accidently hit my clients with this large belly. The worst is when I have boys or men clients in my chair that are not as comfortable with pregnancy as most women. I might accidently bump their arm, and say “I’m sorry” as they lightly try to move their arm off the arm rest and slowly under the cape to hide it from another catastrophe such as my belly bumping into them again.

Well, that’s all for now! I’ll try to post a few more times before Britton comes the end of December, and keep those of you interested, updated!

Buddha Belly

It’s true; my belly is not going to get any smaller until this baby comes out. In fact, just when I think it can’t get any bigger I’m proven wrong. Every morning I wake up only to see more and more of the bedroom walls disappear by my over bearing belly. In fact, It’s the first thing I say good morning to! Although I know it sounds like it, I’m not really complaining! It’s much better than before….When I was three to four months pregnant people just thought I was getting fat. My clients would beat around the bush and say “I can’t remember, do you have any kids?” In hopes that I would tell them I was either growing a little human, or just working on my summer beer belly. I had a client come up to me…literally, TOUCH my belly and say “Is that a baby belly!!???”  For the shock factor (muhhh haha) AND for her repercussions for touching my belly… I replied “umm, no?”  She was mortified….Now that I think about it I don’t think I have seen her since.  See, when your only a few months pregnant you don’t want ANY one touching your belly. Seriously, it’s like drinking several beers, having the “beer bloat” and someone coming up to you and shaking and or touching your belly. It’s not hard, nor round and it’s very daring in that time frame to ask any girl if she is expecting.  So if you’re pregnant in that time frame, have some fun with it. I promise you “the shock factor” makes those few months go by so fast and humorously. Is that mean?

So fast, that I’m finally in the third trimester and felling better knowing that my Buddha belly finally shows that there’s a baby in there! In comparison, is it good luck to rub a pregnant woman’s belly like it is a Buddha? I can’t go anywhere...every stranger wants to rub it. I may even start charging? Unless it gets me in a closer parking space, doors held open, or in front of the grocery line quicker….Seriously, here in Atlanta crosswalks mean absolutely NOTHING to people. I use to dodge cars all the time trying to walk into stores. Now, with my special Buddha belly people will leave skid marks at the cross walk only to stop in time and let me pass.  I’m to the point where I don’t feel like I have to look before crossing... Bad idea?

Aside from all this attention, my Husband shows no mercy. Last night he parked in the furthest parking spot miles away from the restaurant where we were eating.  His book “Pregnancy sucks for men” told him to make me walk ALL the time even if it meant parking far away. Once during this pregnancy, I had the worst tale bone pain ever and for some reason I decided to lay on the floor, when I finally felt the need to get up I asked for his help. He just laughed at me! I looked like a beached whale rolling around trying to find a way to get up. See, this is where my independence bites me in the ass! Normally I can get up on my own…as a matter of fact I can do most things on my own! (ha) So, when I actually need something I’m not taken seriously. But I do only joke; he shows me a lot of mercy even when I don’t deserve it! Unless it means doing something to make  sure the baby will come out faster. Hence, parking miles away. He's been so great to me. He even bought me this HUGE pregnancy pillow (that the book told him about) that I use every night and it really helps me sleep...he may regret it now though, its literally like the great wall of China between us....

This has been a fun and hilarious time for the both of us…we spent FOUR hours registering the other day. We looked like the most clueless inadequate parents ever. I spent most of those four hours laughing and trying to figure things out. I think we may have spent an hour trying to figure out the “easy collapsible” strollers. Let me tell you, those things are NOT easy. Plus they have these breaks on them that you have to manually take off to even make the stroller move. And move it did…right over Derek’s toes, several times.

Ill be sure to keep my few readers updated on our learning progress! Especially, you momma Kaiser. See, she wants me to update my blog EVERY day, like it’s a journal. When in reality I don’t have time to write every day nor am I that interesting and if I did write every day it would be totally boring for anyone to read. Trust me!So every now and then ill be sure to keep everyone posted with several weeks in one blog!

Sincerely,

Buddha Belly

Ill start by saying im not a writer in the least bit. Nor am I a fantastic speller. Im blogging for the purpose of rambling and throwing all my thoughts onto one page to later look back on as memories. Actually, the true reason is because im VERY forgetful (ask my husband)! Im at a time in my life right now that I need to remember all the fun, exhausting, exciting things that have happened over the past few months and all of them to come.So please excuse and forgot all the grammatical and spelling errors that I promise will take place!

And so it begins....Derek and I are expecting our first baby boy in December! How did this happen? I can promise you we asked the same question! Over and over and over...

We got our very first taste of parenthood the first week in April! BUT not in a way that most of you would think. It was the week my twin sister was going to marry the love of her life in Vegas! It was April 1st, Derek and I had been up all night excitedly packing and getting ready to head to Huntsville Alabama to hop on a plane ride with the rest of the family. Letting the excitement ware off and finally asleep, It was then that I received the worst phone call I had ever received in my life from my mom...My dad is suffering a heart attack and was in an ambulance on the way to the hospital. I couldn’t get why her voice was so unbelievably calm. Was this an April fool’s joke? Had they been drinking? This is not funny in the least bit...My mom calmly said "Jessica, dad is having a heart attack." Seriously, I’m sitting up straight in bed screaming "What! He is HAVING a heart attack, Like in the middle of having one? NOT already had one?" I’m helplessly in Atlanta Georgia, four hours away. The first time anything bad is happening and I can’t be there. I won't go thru all the details of the horrible night but I will say my Dad was exceptionally lucky and did so well. Huntsville Hospital got him there so fast and perfect timing. They were so quick that they didn’t have to perform open heart surgery, only a few minor stints were put in. THANK GOD he is still with us.

My dad’s story, Jaime’s wedding and my pregnancy all relate...I promise! Because of this, my dad and mom could not be at Jaime’s wedding. Derek and myself along with my older sister and her boyfriend decided that we would take Addison (My sisters little girl) along with us. My parents were going to watch her the whole trip and since this had happened they were going to keep her back in Alabama. Jaime already has to go thru this day without my dad...having her daughter stay back and not be a part of the wedding would just add to the heart break. So here it goes, Full time parents with my three year old little niece on the way to Vegas! Not exactly what we planned...but a time we will never forget. I won't go thru the details of the trip but I have to add you in on one little detail....I bathed Addison every morning and did her hair, Derek was such an awesome help and we had a lot of fun playing parents for the most part. Even if it was in Vegas. When we returned "our" sweet child, Jaime realized something out of the ordinary. Addison’s breath smelt bad. I’m thinking, well...she was bathed every day and her hair looks good! But...she’s three years oldwhat do you expect?Its not like a three year old brushes their teeth. She later asked the glorious question..."Did you brush her teeth at all on the trip?" Derek and I just blankly looked at each other. "WAIT? Three year olds do brush their teeth?"

After the trip everyone decided we needed to be parents even if we didnt know three year olds brush teeth. WE didn’t think we needed to be parents just then. Although, we knew we would be great ones when the time came. We wanted another year before even thinking of becoming parents in the least. We love spending time together and are quite selfish with it. So having a baby soon was not an option in our selfish world. Several weeks had past...It was the weekend of our ONE year anniversary!! We had major plans to celebrate with a nice hotel, lots of whisky, a very good dinner down town and yes, more whisky. It was at dinner when I realized...This is weird I haven’t started my period. We (or the whisky) joked around that I was pregnant, because "like that would ever happen". I mean I didn’t feel pregnant as a matter of fact I even lost ten pounds. Aside from feeling tired I had no symptoms. BUT to ease our minds we decided that the next day we would take a test. ... ... ...

Sure enough, the stick revealed a positive sign. I actually wasn’t sure it was a positive to be honest. One line was really blue and the other that completed the "+" was very faint. I showed Derek and we came to conclude that we got a malfunctioning test. So I took the other one in the pack. Same thing. They both were beyond defective. I decided (to ease my mind) that I would go pick up the tests for stupid people "pregnant" or "not pregnant". I got home and tried out both of those stupid people tests...PREGNANT!!...ANOTHER defective one?? No, I walked into the kitchen showed my husband and did something most married women dont normally do, I buckled over crying scared to death. I think Derek even ran to the bathroom gagging (haha). On his mind: Finances. On my mind: The delivery. Those are very legit reasons to be scared, right? It literally took weeks for the pregnancy to set in and to realize what was actually going to happen and how much life was actually going to dramatically change.

So here we are nearing the end of the six, of the ten months. Yes, ten months. Forty weeks IS ten months. Where ever did this misconception happen?

We are expecting a little boy in December, named Britton Thomas! Now being use to the idea, we couldn’t be happier with the life changes that are about to take place. Although I was worried that Derek would never warm up to this strange thing called pregnancy (ha), he is having much more fun in the baby stores shopping, than I am! It’s heart warming to see his excitement and even better to see his eyes get large from surprise when he feels Britton Kick. This is a journey im so blessed to be going thru with Derek.